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You and your guy may be a better match than PB&J, but that won’t make him propose. Psychologist Alon Gratch, PhD, reveals the tipping factor that will. It has been reported recently that supermodel Gisele is less than happy about her ex Leonardo DiCaprio’s alleged engagement to his current girlfriend (which he’s denied). It doesn’t matter that Gisele is supposedly hot and heavy with her new sweetheart, NFL quarterback Tom Brady. Every chick knows how hard it is when she puts in serious time with a guy who refuses to commit... until he moves on to his next girlfriend, and then suddenly, he’s springing for a rock. Women assume that a guy will pop the question once he finds someone he’s compatible with, i.e., The One. But that’s not enough to push him over the edge, according to clinical psychologist Alon Gratch, PhD, author of If Men Could Talk . What, then, does it take? “Being ready,” says Gratch. “In my 25 years of experience working with men as a relationship therapist, it’s 49 p...

In the beginning, guys go out of their way to show they care with blatant, over-the-top gestures. Learn why you shouldn't panic when, over time, his actions take a surprising turn. When you first start dating a guy, it's easy to fall hard and fast. The reason: He's on an all-out mission to charm the pants off you...literally and figuratively. "The wooing stage is about selling himself and putting his best foot forward," says Calgary, Canada, sexologist Trina Read, Ph.D. Once he's succeeded in sweeping you off your feet though, you'll start to notice various changes in him. Some are nice -- he seems so much more comfortable with you, for instance. But others may come across as negative or just plain bizarre. Here's a surprise: That kind of behavior can actually confirm that he's stuck on you like glue. Confused? Don't worry, we explain it all here. 1. He Shows His Vulnerability Many guys think women are looking for the kind of dude who exudes st...

The easy answer is… He tells you. He shows you. And you feel it. But in real life, it can be a little less straightforward than that. For instance, you might get involved with a man who avoids saying “I love you” because he feels awkward, uncomfortable, or even scared at the thought of it. Maybe he grew up in a family that discouraged the direct expression of love. Or maybe in the past he declared his love to a woman, and she ended up burning him. And you know what? Even if he can’t describe his sad reason for not being able to clarify his feelings for you, it might not matter! Because, one of women’s greatest temptations in relationships is imagining what that sad reason might be, and desperately believing it - whether or not it’s true. Then, of course, you might be tempted to love the guy all the more for the (real or imaginary…) sad reason that he can’t possibly tell you that he loves you. This is risky, though. More than one woman who’s sympathized with ...

I'll call him John . The first time we met, he actually struck me as a bit arrogant. He irritated me enough that I mentioned him to my husband in a "Can you believe this guy?" kind of way. But I interacted with John only occasionally, always through work and mostly over e-mail, so it wasn't a huge deal. He's just one of those people who gets under my skin, I told myself. But a little over a year into our working relationship, something changed. One day, John let down his guard with me and I responded, I suppose in part because I couldn't help but be curious about his mostly hidden soft side. Our conversations turned to easy banter and later — I have a hard time admitting this even now — flirtation. Our e-mails, which could number several in one day, never included outright expressions of affection toward each other. Instead, our notes were mostly business peppered with friendly sparring. We shared a similar sense of humor. I felt that he got me. I told...

He makes your heart skip a beat, but is it lust or love? Searching for that one special person can be very confusing especially with the first flush of falling in love. Try to step back and rationally look at the relationship you are building. Even in the earliest stages, you can discern important information that will tell you whether this is just a fleeting affair of the heart or rock solid love that will last a lifetime. Here are 10 Ways to tell if he is Mr. Right or Mr. Wrong: 1. You absolutely know he wants you as much as you want him. If it's right, your feelings of love are reciprocal and mutual and not one-sided. 2. He walks into a room, and you just have to smile. You can't help it! And when you look at him, he's smiling at you. 3. You do kind and sweet things for each other just because you want to and not because you feel you have to. Doing them makes you both feel good--and special. 4. You are very secure in the relationship. There is no need for jealousy or sus...

IT can happen in the blink of an eye. Attraction. Excitement. Romance. But for too many Sisters who are searching for Mr. Right (not Mr. Right Now), the game of love is a crooked road of broken promises where the coveted jackpot, referred to as "the one," is too late, long-gone or maybe destined to never show at all. But there is hope. "Although there is risk in love, there are also great rewards when passion and purpose fall within the right embrace," says Dr. Grace Cornish, author of 7 Spiritual Truths to Recognize and Marry Your Very Own Soul Mate. So before you jump on the twisted path of romance, familiarize yourself with the signs you'll encounter along the way, and recognize which will lead your hopes and heart to the man of your dreams. The following tips should help you gauge the possibilities and help you determine if he's "the one": * He Listens to You. Before your man opens his heart to you, he has to first open his ears. "Ge...

Do you have a cute neighbor? A flirt buddy at work? Someone you look forward to talking to every day--other than your husband? In this excerpt from Getting Past the Affair , three psychologists set the record straight on those so-called innocent friendships and why they so often lead to more. Find out if you're taking things too far -- and putting your relationship at risk -- with this test. Is Flirting Hurting? It feels good to feel attractive or desirable. We all like to receive compliments. “Innocent” flirtation often feels good for similar reasons. It's often reassuring to know that someone else considers us bright, charming, witty, successful, emotionally sensitive, caring, strong, physically attractive, supportive, or whatever other characteristic we'd like to believe about ourselves. It feels especially good to receive such compliments when we tend to have self-doubts or haven't been receiving such comments from our partner. It's not unusual to be drawn int...

The top ten excuses they use in sticky situations He who said “The truth can set you free” probably wasn't in a relationship. In that minefield of potential disasters , telling the truth can often lead to a stint on the couch, or worse yet, a sudden stint of singledom . As we've navigated through these treacherous waters over the years, men have picked up a few tricks. Every guy has his cache of fallback excuses -- not egregious, deceitful fabrications, just little white lies to help smooth things over. You can usually rely on tried and tested classics to get you through the “Do I look fat in these jeans?” moments, but sometimes situations arise that make you scramble to come up with something new. We've assembled a list of 10 of the most common male excuses to help you avoid ever having to flounder in such a situation again -- because if we're going to get through this minefield alive, we're going to have to do it together. Number 10: “You look great in everyt...

Heart attacks are not always fatal -- and neither is adultery. Cardiac patients can survive and even thrive, once they find a healthier way of living. After an affair, a couple can do the same by finding a healthier way of loving. I know how wrenching adultery can be, because I watched it nearly tear apart my own family. I also know from my own experience, both personal and professional, that adultery can be a forgivable sin. Fidelity is not a guarantee that love persists, nor is infidelity a sign that love has faded or died. In fact, adultery can even be a way -- albeit dysfunctional -- to try and stabilize a floundering relationship. Why is adultery so frightening and yet so fascinating? In part because we recognize the appeal of it. We grew up in triangles, competing for our mother's attentions with our father and our siblings, and vice versa. That taught us, deep inside, to be terrified of abandonment and to resent sharing. We never quite give up on the childish fantasy...