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Why should men settle for women that only offer appearances? Some women still believe that their beauty is enough to keep men happy. Those days are long gone. Men no longer settle for such raw deals. So what makes a woman a great catch? Today, professional and successful men are in hot pursuit of smart, funny, independent, spontaneous, and very sexy women. Why shouldn't we? After all, don't we deserve better than women whose only talent is tossing their hair from one shoulder to the other? If you are in a relationship right now, stop for a moment and analyze your current situation. Is your girlfriend a keeper, or should you just sweep her away? It's time to look for the five crucial qualities of a Gold Medal Girlfriend . 1. Independence makes her strong Women who have balanced lives and interests of their own and who don't depend on men are the ones who can attract men without effort. Desperation to find men and get married are qualities that will drive most men away...

Although living together is now acceptable, 60 per cent of cohabiting couples still get married after a few years. Relationship psychotherapist Paula Hall looks at why we still marry in the face of divorce statistics and how to make sure it's the right choice for you. "Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet" - Mae West Good reasons to marry Because you're in love. Although love shouldn't be the only reason to marry, it's an important ingredient in the most successful relationships. To make a commitment. You've decided that you want to be together forever, knowing each other's faults and failings. It's part of your culture. The ceremony of marriage is an integral part of your cultural or religious beliefs and an essential part of your core value system. To start a family. You've both enjoyed a secure and committed relationship for some time and feel marriage is the best environment in which to bring up...

You and your guy may be a better match than PB&J, but that won’t make him propose. Psychologist Alon Gratch, PhD, reveals the tipping factor that will. It has been reported recently that supermodel Gisele is less than happy about her ex Leonardo DiCaprio’s alleged engagement to his current girlfriend (which he’s denied). It doesn’t matter that Gisele is supposedly hot and heavy with her new sweetheart, NFL quarterback Tom Brady. Every chick knows how hard it is when she puts in serious time with a guy who refuses to commit... until he moves on to his next girlfriend, and then suddenly, he’s springing for a rock. Women assume that a guy will pop the question once he finds someone he’s compatible with, i.e., The One. But that’s not enough to push him over the edge, according to clinical psychologist Alon Gratch, PhD, author of If Men Could Talk . What, then, does it take? “Being ready,” says Gratch. “In my 25 years of experience working with men as a relationship therapist, it’s 49 p...

The old-fashioned new relationship trend by Sherry Amatenstein Returning home to Birmingham, Alabama, after grad school last year, Satina Richardson was determined to "work on her personal life," and by that she really meant "find a husband." Obsessed with wearing that white dress within one year's time, Satina began her very own " Operation: Matrimony ." Since there were no hot prospects on her horizon, the then 29-year-old opted to date a jerk she'd long been avoiding ‑- just for the sake of dating someone . Not surprisingly, the relationship was a disaster from day one, yet she still hung in there waiting for him to propose. And did he? Yep. He proposed to the woman he'd been seeing behind Satina's back. Why did a smart woman like Satina do something as stupid as wasting time with someone so wrong for her? Well, while her philosophy may seem old-fashioned, what she did is more common than you'd think. And who knows? It migh...

Getting married is once in a lifetime decision for many people. When people wish to get married, invariably all of them expect a full life together. Very few would think of marriage as a short-term exercise. Hence, it is very much necessary that all aspects of a life together be fully analyzed before tying the knot. Usually men and women tend to have different perspectives about married life. It would be better to have open and honest discussion to sort out the possible future irritants or at least understand them so that some sort of compromise could be arrived at. The reasons that a man looks at while desiring to marry her are innumerous. However, a few of them top the list in order of priority. For most men, the need of a woman in life is necessitated by the motherly love that he had received in his early life. He needs a woman who can show him the same love and who could fulfill his physical and emotional needs . That is why many men look for the same qualities in a w...

When James Douglas Barron's girlfriend wanted to get married, he was, well, afraid. What threw this otherwise brave man into a fit if fear? Simple. He thought long-term commitment would ruin their fun relationship. Now that they are married (and happy), James thinks his prenuptial terror couldn't have been more amiss. In his book, She Wants a Ring -- and I Don't Wanna Change a Thing he offers advice to other commitment-phobes and along the way gives women a glimpse into the male psyche. "For a guy, the decision to get married is a series of educated guesses," says Barron. "For some women -- not all -- it's intuition. That's why it's so terrifying for men. They feel as though they're at sea without a paddle while women are sailing through the water on course." Ready for some real insight from a real guy? Some are more serious than others, but here are James' top 10 reasons why men (even your man) may be afraid to get hitch...

He may be testing you to find out You've been getting closer with a woman and you're thinking, Hmm… she might be the one. But in the back of your mind an insistent little voice keeps nagging, This is too good to be true. And instant replays of all the mood swings, temper tantrums and unbridled greediness of your past girlfriends flit through your brain. Maybe there have been inklings that all is not sunny in relationship paradise; or maybe you're just feeling a need to tap the brakes a little and tread cautiously — after all, dating is a significant investment of time if you're not headed in the right direction. So before you commit, put her to the test. Women are constantly testing us and constantly evaluating the results, so it's only fair for us to turn the tables. Here are a few tests you can try on for size: Excess baggage Lots of women are the "walking wounded" — they carry around unresolved hurt and anger from past relationships and expect the ...

by Susan Swimmer Want to know whether your current Mr. Right could be your mate for life? In this excerpt from Is He the One? 101 Questions That Will Lead You to the Truth, Whatever That Is , author Susan Swimmer says the honest answers to a few key questions could help you find out. Here are 10 to get you started: 1. Does he think he's a lucky guy? You'd like to think that he is a man who understands that life is made up of part luck and part hard work, and that both elements will affect him at some point. A man who thinks himself lucky in any way is someone who radiates gratitude, which in turn creates an aura of joyousness. And that's all good. But what really matters is that, at the very least, he is a man who feels wildly fortunate to have you in his life, because a guy who feels that way will make sure you know you're adored. And how lucky is that? 2. Are his little faults things you can handle? Everyone is bugged by something. Does he drink directly from the cart...

Contrary to popular belief, most guys want to get married... eventually. It may take us longer to recognize the symptoms of marriageitis , but it's there nonetheless. Sharing our lives with one woman, having steady sex for life and the possibility of kids crosses our minds. Of course, this could all result from your woman's constant hinting at marriage. Hey, it's like Chris Rock says, "Women get married; men surrender." While you're chewing on that, have a look at the top 10 things that should alert you to the fact that you might want to "make an honest woman" out of your current belle. 10. You want to settle down Feeling like the pace of single life is too hectic? Do you look at your single friends as if they're all just running around pointlessly from party to party with no greater ambition than finding their next "lay"? More importantly, have you caught yourself contemplating whether there's something more ? There is, and your gu...

BY ELLEN FEIN AND SHERRIE SCHNEIDER Getting the man you want to propose -- and then turning that proposal into an actual wedding date -- can be a tougher deal to close than a media merger . Of course, if you've been following The Rules (the set of dating guidelines outlined in our book, The Rules: Time Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right , Warner Books, 1995) from the moment you met Mr. Right and he's said he loves you, he will propose -- sometimes in a matter of a few months but usually within 15 months. (He may have his own rules about dating for four seasons before popping the question, and there's nothing wrong with that.) Don't Break These Rules Following The Rules means letting him pursue you -- not seeing him more than two or three times a week, refusing to go away with him on week-long vacations, and not moving in with him or crowding him in any way. If you've done all these things, you've actually helped him fall in lov...

BY NICOLE BELAND Looking to be an exclusive couple? Dying to get engaged? Cosmo tells you how to fast-forward your union...without freaking him out. In a perfect world, all romantic relationships would sail smoothly from sort-of-dating to madly-in-love. More often than not, though, the road to Coupleville is dotted with commitment detours , ones that your man seems unable to navigate. Carrie*, 26, has been with her boyfriend, Jeff, for four fun-filled months. But now she's ready to kick it up a notch on the serious scale. "I want a more defined relationship," she explains. "I'm scared that if I don't do something to take us forward, Jeff won't either because, well, he's a guy." You can relate, right? Who doesn't want to get closer to a man you're crazy about? But pushing for a tighter bond is a tricky task. After all, many men are perfectly happy keeping things between the two of you the same...indefinitely. So how do you give your love...

by Sherry Amatenstein Men and marriage -- ever wonder what it takes to get the two together? If you're trying to get your boyfriend to make a commitment, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you can stop trying to manipulate, sweet-talk or pressure him into proposing. The bad news is that there's nothing you can do to speed up the process. That's not to say it'll never happen. Men fall in love and get married every day. But men have their own biological clocks . When they're ready, they head down the aisle -- but not a moment sooner. In the meantime, it's not possible to convince commitment-phobic guy that you're the best thing that will ever happen to him -- even if you are! Instead, your best bet is looking for someone who doesn't need convincing. The Sex and the City gang once compared a marriage-ready man to a taxi: At a certain point in his life, he becomes ready for commitment. His "available" light goes on and the ne...