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For as long as there have been men and women, there have been dating and dating rituals . Being the sly hunters we are, men have built up a reservoir of knowledge and cunning over the millennia on how to successfully woo the ladies over the first few weeks of a courtship. There are many fish in the sea, and there are many baiting procedures you can use to reel them in. And though many women may be aware of some of our strategies, they surely don't know of all of them. Let's keep it that way, gentlemen. Keep these timeless secret dating tips under your hat and enjoy the learning process. 10. Wait three days before calling back The idea behind this dating rule of thumb is to make sure that your new squeeze doesn't think you're desperate to see her. And it's become a golden rule because it often works. Many women know the dating game, and want to see if their new man can play it. Prove that you can by keeping it cool, and resisting the urge to follow up on a meeting t...

Men love women. The way they look, smell, walk and talk are just some of the reasons why we consider them a divine species. Yet we can't live with them, and we certainly can't live without them... ...for the most part anyway, because perfect, they are not. And upon serious analysis, I've discovered the top 10 things women do that drive men to the brink of insanity. 10. Pretend to be virtuous A recurring theme among many women is that they try to place themselves under a "holier than thou" light, never admitting that they fooled around or dividing their number of boyfriends by five. Now, we applaud those ladies who truly are innocent and pure , but the rest should stop trying to water down their past. Women are allowed to have just as much fun as guys, and they should find a man who can appreciate that. 9. Criticize other women Why is it that many women can't make a simple compliment toward another woman? They love to nitpick about everything from weight to ...

There are certain things a man never wants to hear from his lady. "Let's go shopping" is one of them, as those words usually herald a whole afternoon wasted near the women's fitting rooms. "You're acting like your father" is another, much harsher statement. Even worse, "You're acting like my father"; that one just hurts. Below, however, are the most fearsome, most harrowing combinations of words a female can utter. 10. I've been thinking... If she actually tells you she's been thinking, it's serious. And you can bet it involves marriage, cohabitation or the bitter end. It can take many forms, such as: "Why do you love me?" and "Have you ever thought about the future?" Again, have a brilliant exit plan at hand. A severed finger, for instance. 9. Be a man. Nothing is quite as injurious as having your very manhood questioned. You could give in to her shame tactics and do what she wants , or deflect it by s...

He may be testing you to find out You've been getting closer with a woman and you're thinking, Hmm… she might be the one. But in the back of your mind an insistent little voice keeps nagging, This is too good to be true. And instant replays of all the mood swings, temper tantrums and unbridled greediness of your past girlfriends flit through your brain. Maybe there have been inklings that all is not sunny in relationship paradise; or maybe you're just feeling a need to tap the brakes a little and tread cautiously — after all, dating is a significant investment of time if you're not headed in the right direction. So before you commit, put her to the test. Women are constantly testing us and constantly evaluating the results, so it's only fair for us to turn the tables. Here are a few tests you can try on for size: Excess baggage Lots of women are the "walking wounded" — they carry around unresolved hurt and anger from past relationships and expect the n...

Why should men settle for women that only offer appearances? Some women still believe that their beauty is enough to keep men happy. Those days are long gone. Men no longer settle for such raw deals. So what makes a woman a great catch? Today, professional and successful men are in hot pursuit of smart, funny, independent, spontaneous, and very sexy women. Why shouldn't we? After all, don't we deserve better than women whose only talent is tossing their hair from one shoulder to the other? If you are in a relationship right now, stop for a moment and analyze your current situation. Is your girlfriend a keeper, or should you just sweep her away? It's time to look for the five crucial qualities of a Gold Medal Girlfriend . 1. Independence makes her strong Women who have balanced lives and interests of their own and who don't depend on men are the ones who can attract men without effort. Desperation to find men and get married are qualities that will drive most men away...

by Sherry Argov You've heard that nice guys finish last, but what about nice girls? In this excerpt from her book Why Men Marry Bitches , author Sherry Argov reveals why men actually prefer a confident, secure woman (Argov's definition of the word bitch ) to one who lets her man take the reins in a relationship. She surveyed real men , who spilled exactly what makes or breaks their opinion of the women they meet — and it turns out that having your own life, making your own plans and not letting him win all the time only makes you more attractive. So who says being a "bitch" is a bad thing? Not these guys! Here's what they had to say: "The worst thing a woman can do is see a guy every night of the week. That's how she becomes his good-time girl on his 'reserve list.' What will happen is, the guy will start coming over at nine o'clock and then he'll leave by ten-thirty. If he gets access or what he wants from her anytime he wants it, he won...

From highlights to heels, guys reveal what works--and what doesn't by Steve Santagati Let's face it: We all want to look sexy sometimes. And whether you're into a vintage style, or the full-on va-va-voom, we have to wonder, what do guys notice? If you ever wanted to know about men's preferences—like whether your Manolos even register on his Richter scale—here's your definitive guide. In this excerpt from The Manual , you'll find out for sure what men find sexy. Attention to vanity will seem shallow at times, but in the game of love, it's very important. Most people I see are lazy in this department. And, not surprisingly, these are the same people who complain, saying things such as “People are so superficial,” “I want him to love me for what's inside ,” or “ I hate the gym .” Well, no one is telling you that you can't dress as you choose. But when you put those constraints on yourself, you're limiting the number of men who will find you...

By Debra Kent You’re suddenly single after years of marriage or long term-relationship, and you’re wondering how you will navigate the murky waters of modern dating—especially when it comes to sex. You may discover that the rules have changed or, more to the point, there really are no rules. The landscape has changed too, with the advent of Internet dating, chat rooms, and concepts like “friends with benefits.” Whether you’re interested in casual sex or a serious relationship, it helps to know what your date is thinking. We polled the relationship experts for clues that your date or date-to-be has only one thing in mind—and it’s not a long-term relationship. Here are the top eight signals that someone’s only interested in sex. Use this info to decide how you want to proceed: Read between the lines. Online profiles can reveal much about a prospective date’s intentions, says Alyssa Wodtke, co-author of Truth, Lies, and Online Dating: Secrets to Finding Romance on the Internet . Watch f...

By Laura J. Schaefer Of all the endeavors you can pursue, dating can be one of the most enjoyable. It's entertaining, it provides companionship, and it can lead to lasting love and partnership. But as you decide whether you're ready to date, make sure you are doing it for the right reason: You have a full life that you'd like to share with another person. With that in mind, here are a few bad reasons to date … Your friends want you paired off: Just because your friends are married or coupled up doesn't mean you have to find "your other half." If they are pressuring you to date, be firm. You need to date because you want to, not because everyone else in your life thinks it's the thing to do. You can't stand to be alone: If you approach dating with the desperation of a person who is uncomfortable spending any time alone, you might not choose a suitable partner. Learn to enjoy your own company and that of your friends and family before embarking on new...

By Rachel Sarah When I entered the dating world again — as the 32-year-old single mom of a toddler — my time constraints and frumpy wardrobe weren’t the only things that stressed me out. It was also money. Dating can be expensive—even before you’ve said “hello” to a prospective mate. The monthly online dating fee was worth it, but it was already a stretch for me. How was I going to pay for dinner and a movie, too? Eager to get out, I was forced to be creative, and soon I discovered that even when your money is tight, it doesn’t mean you have to sit home alone and watch Grey’s Anatomy . Make that first date an unusual one Forget the expensive Italian restaurant or impressing your date with center row theater tickets. Doing something unusual can make it easier to socialize, and also take financial pressure out of the equation. According to Diane Mapes, the author of How to Date in a Post-Dating World , it’s especially important to keep first-date expenses down. “Money can be such a huge...

By Chelsea Kaplan Have your past relationships left you with enough emotional baggage to fill an entire airplane? If so, it’s time to let go of it before your next relationship crashes and burns, says Terri Orbuch, Ph.D., the host of Detroit’s popular “Love Doctor” live television and radio programs. Below, find her tips on how to lighten your load: Don’t despair—you are not alone Though you may feel like the only person out there with unhealed scars from previous breakups, everyone else has ’em, too. “All people have some amount of baggage associated with past relationships,” says Dr. Orbuch. “It’s the amount of baggage that matters.” While it’s normal to occasionally compare past relationships with your present one, if you find yourself comparing every behavior and quality of a new date to your old flame, it is time to deal with the past, she says. Once you’ve done so, you’ll be able to move forward without the need to constantly revisit the past. Forge new memories All couples hav...

By Robert W. Harris Don’t get me wrong: In general, men are in awe of women’s date-night conversation skills, which, hands down, are far superior to their own. Even so, though, you gals do still insert your stiletto’d foot in your mouth every once in awhile—or, conversely, miss prime opportunities to make a remark that would raise your stock in our eyes. Curious whether you’ve got the right choice phrases in your back pocket and whether you’re avoiding the bad ones? Check out this list of things guys love (and hate) to hear on a date for the lowdown. 5 things men love to hear on a date... “Then what happened?” It’s human: A man likes to think that his life is reasonably interesting. And while interrupting him, changing the subject, or acting bored are well-known nails in the coffin, it’s not enough to just sit there, smile, and say, “Uh-huh” every few seconds. Actively egg him on with comments like, “You’re kidding! What happened next?” or “Go on...” That way, he’ll know you’re genuin...

By Dave Singleton “Things were going great until she…”: That’s the refrain I heard when I asked guys what happens when they date a woman and then dump her. I’m not saying that women should bear the brunt of all breakups or feel as if they are to blame. My goal here is to illuminate the kind of behavior that most often turns a guy from happily dating toward thinking, “This isn’t going well….” Hear what they have to say, and see if you can gain a little insight into the male mind that can help you in future relationships. Miss Overly Dependent. “The first six months we dated, she took care of herself and did everything that she needed to do on her own,” says Tim, 33, of St. Louis. “Then she started asking me what I thought about everything. I understand some questions, but it was the daily stuff that I never got asked about before that bugged me. She wanted to know what she should pack for trips that we took, even though she’d already researched the weather and knew the itinerary. She ...

By Michael and Tim Burke For the past few years, thanks to the breakthrough book He’s Just Not That Into You , women everywhere have been duly warned of all the ways men try to wiggle free from relationships without ever really saying so. Many single gals owe their sanity to this book, which taught them to stop wondering why he didn’t call and just accept the truth: that it wasn’t meant to be. Still, amidst all these downplayed expectations we got to wondering: Don’t women also want to know when guys are in hot pursuit? To that end, we’ve interrogated a small army of men (and some savvy women) to uncover some tell-tale signs he actually is that into you, whether you’ve just met or have been dating awhile. Read on for the good news. He can’t relax Keith Duncan, 31, wasn’t exactly excited to tell us this, but “There always seems to be a bit more pressure on me when I’m talking to a girl I really like. The room gets warm, I don’t feel as humorous as I usually am, and I keep hearing in...

By Dave Singleton When it comes to sizing up our dates, don’t we all feel a little Seinfeld-ian from time to time? When I interviewed women for this article, I heard many, many complaints—from the universal, easily understood to the mystifyingly personal. Let me give you some samples: “He smoked.” “He wasn’t nice to the waiter.” “He put ketchup on his eggs—gross!” “His shoes were too pointy.” “His nose hair needed grooming.” “He looked like he’d be a slobbery kisser.” During those early dates, many of us turn into Jerry, Elaine and George, and nitpick our dates into obscurity. But after you’ve made it through the first few obstacles and dated him for a few months, what are the next series of “should we continue or not” hurdles you face? I discovered there are some common themes when it comes to why women give a guy a chance… and then give him the old heave-ho. Listen in as women share what turns Mr. Maybe into Mr. Not-If-You-Were-the-Last-Man-on-Earth: Mr. Bad Manners. “While eating ...

By Nina Malkin Maybe in an alternate universe, women approach men by simply saying: “Hello! I find you ever so attractive and intriguing!” Not so much on this planet. Sure, some girls have sledgehammer flirting techniques and courting ploys, but most give off more subtle signals. And in case you’re wondering if one such lovely specimen is batting her eyes at you, here we slip you some tell-tale tip-offs. The power of touch Body language speaks volumes—and goes beyond the blatant hair toss. Shrugging the shoulders, flashing the wrists, massaging the neck and basically any kind of self-touching are all invitations to romance. “We stroke ourselves for two reasons,” says Tracey Cox, author of Superflirt . “To draw attention to a body part and to subconsciously tease the person watching.” So if she’s making you hot under the collar, it’s because she wants to—consider that a big green light. Girlish antics Dating may still feel like high school for good reason: Grown women can really regres...

By Gilda Carle, Ph.D. Most of us — even the not-so-jealous types — know that feeling of, “Is my sweetheart really working late… or could this person be two-timing me?” I’ve counseled many individuals dealing with this concern, so let me share my knowledge with you about the signs that someone is cheating (or seriously contemplating it). Use this information and insight—and either stop worrying or have a serious talk with your partner! Sign #1: Your sweetie keeps you a secret from his/her family & friends Cheaters keep you in the dark while they play in the light. Your relationship won’t work if you’re getting what I call the Shadow Treatment. The Shadow Treatment means that you are often kept waiting in the wings while your mate is out socializing. Think about it: Are there gatherings of friends, family reunions or workplace parties that you are not invited to? Do you only meet some of your honey’s network of friends? If you are kept on the sidelines, there’s probably a good reaso...